Shadow Seekers’ Dispatch, Ed. 6
In This Edition
Hello Seeker,
An Epsom salt bath can loosen the body for an hour. Then the old ache creeps back in, damp and familiar. The bath was never going to pull the root out by itself.
Soft towels have their place. So does rest. So does silence. Grit-based care starts where comfort stops distracting you. It starts in the clenched jaw, the tight shoulder, the scar, and the body that creaks while it tries to hold the secret.
Society does not want to hear about it. The world without trauma prefers to keep these secrets on a schedule. People want to pass a ribbon in April and pretend they understand. They want the awareness without hearing the actual stories. They avoid the truth we live in our brains, our bodies, and our blood.
April in the US carries a heavy calendar: sexual assault awareness, child abuse prevention, alcohol awareness, stress awareness, and the ongoing work of ending domestic violence. At least we give these things a month. There is a lot to tell. Violence and chronic threat leave depression, anxiety, PTSD, and a nervous system that keeps bracing long after the room is safe.
I support the work of ending domestic violence because I know how much harm survives behind clean doors and careful faces. Awareness matters when it moves people toward action and safer choices. It gets thin when it lets us nod at the wound and walk past the root.
That is where grit-work begins. It asks for the part underneath the bath, underneath the nice answer, underneath the version of care that only helps until the pain creeps back. It asks you to get the uncomfortable material out where you can see it, before it keeps feeding on your marrow in the dark.
Check the end of this email for a list of agencies ready to provide support and guidance.
Self-Care That’s Pure Grit
Jung defined active imagination as a deliberate dialogue with the unconscious. You invite the unseen forces in your psyche to take a form, sit across from you, and speak. You give the Shadow, the fear, or the instinct a surface. Then you interact with it. You let the unconscious drive the outcome. You listen to the answer.
These are short practices for getting uncomfortable things out where you can see them. Choose one. Set a timer for ten minutes. Stop while you still have your footing.
1. Map the Body’s Grit
Choose the part of your body carrying the most tension right now. Shoulders. Stomach. Scar. Throat. Hands.
Draw that place without improving it. Use hard lines if the part feels guarded. Use thick color if the feeling has weight. Use torn paper if the body feels scraped from the inside. Let the mark show what you carry instead of what you want to show.
Now, ask the shape to speak. Write its exact answer on the page.
- What feels loud?
- What looks sickly?
- What have you been waiting for me to notice?
2. Give the Force a Shape
Some things inside you are trying to protect something. Some are trying to speak. Some are embedded deeper than your hands can reach, working through pressure, numbness, or a locked jaw.
Draw a simple body shape. Mark where the force lives today. Keep it workable. Choose something you can approach and still stay in the room with yourself.
Start the dialogue. Question it:
- Where do you feed?
- How did you enter?
- What can make you leave?
Let your hand answer with color, pressure, scribble, or empty space. Let the force dictate the mark. The drawing exists to show you what your body already knows.
Before you close, add one mark where the force has too much access. A boundary. A wall. A darker edge. A witness. A hand saying enough.
3. Aromatherapy for the Unseen Interruption
Clary sage carries intuition. Patchouli carries grounding in the present. Together, they mark the room as a place for honest attention.
Diffuse lightly, or place the scent nearby. Sit still. Invite the part of your Shadow that keeps interrupting your sleep or your work to sit with you.
Ask it directly:
- What are you afraid will be seen?
- What have I been hiding from myself?
- What do you need me to know?
Write its answers without editing them. Do not let your marks shrink. When you finish, fold the page. Seal it. Keep it in the journal or tear it up. The point is letting the fear take a form you can face.
4. Stone Grid for the Excuses
Place carnelian, amethyst, and clear quartz around your creative space. Carnelian brings creative force. Amethyst brings inward sight. Clear quartz amplifies the intention present in the room. Use them as anchors when perfectionism starts circling the studio.
Sit inside the space. Put both feet on the floor.
Give your procrastination a shape in your mind. Ask it why it refuses to work.
Listen to the sentence it gives back. Write that sentence down. Then name the smallest honest action available. Grit begins when the hand moves and the excuse loses its grip.
5. Dialogue in the Bitter Cup
Ginseng carries strength. Dandelion carries release. Rosemary carries clarity. Together, they create a bitter, sturdy ritual for the part of you that needs care with backbone.
Brew the tea. Hold the cup. Let the taste remind you that care does not always arrive sweet.
Speak to the weight you are carrying. Ask it:
- Why are you weighing me down?
- What pattern keeps you so heavy?
- What happens if I put you down?
Let the weight answer. Let the answers stay plain. Grit rejects ornament. Grit requires honesty, structure, and a place to put the heavy things.
JoJo’s Oddities
JoJo’s Oddities™ gives the strange a body.
These dolls belong to the offbeat, the uncanny, the historical, the fictional, the gothic, the peculiar, and the entities that refuse to behave on a shelf. They are often frightening characters built with material, symbol, and presence. They do not soften what makes a subject unsettling. They give it form.
Send me the figure, creature, or concept that will not leave you alone. Plague doctors, literary figures, cryptids, monsters, and the scary thing that keeps tapping the glass.
Tell me what makes it linger. The best oddities carry more than weirdness. They carry atmosphere, memory, and a reason to exist.
Contact me with ideas.
Early Examples of JoJo’s Oddities™
A Plague Doctor
Worry Doll Pendants
Day of the Dead Dancers
From the Shadow Seekers’ Journal
Closing
On the blog, I’m circling the harder side of self-care: body truth, creative pressure, fear, resistance, and the grit-work of getting what hurts out where you can see it.
That is the line running through this Dispatch. Awareness matters when it moves into action. Active imagination gives that action a form: one body map, one hard question, one bitter cup of tea, one mark that refuses to keep the secret clean.
Start there. Small. Uncomfortable. Real.
Grit is care that can stay in the room with the ugly part.
With you in the work,
Kellie Jo Close
Artist & Author
For Women Who Want to Know What They’ve Buried. And Why.
https://kelliejoart.com | https://linktr.ee/kelliejoart
Sources
April is Paralyzed Veterans Awareness Month, Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month, National Counseling Awareness Month, and National Minority Health Month. Please share these resources with someone who could use the support.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline: Provides 24/7 support to anyone experiencing domestic violence, offering confidential assistance, safety planning, and resources.
The VA (Department of Veterans Affairs): Offers a wide range of services to veterans, including healthcare, mental health support, and assistance with Military Sexual Trauma (MST). The VA provides free treatment for any mental or physical health conditions related to your experiences of MST. You don’t need documentation of the MST experiences or a VA disability rating to get care. And you may be able to get MST-related care even if you aren’t eligible for other VA services.
RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network): The nation’s largest anti-sexual violence organization, operating a national hotline and providing support to survivors of sexual assault.
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: A national network of local crisis centers that provides 24/7 free and confidential emotional support to people in suicidal crisis, emotional distress, or for anyone worried about a friend or loved one.
NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness): A grassroots mental health organization that provides education, advocacy, and support to individuals and families affected by mental illness.
MHA (Mental Health America): Focuses on prevention, early intervention, and wellness, addressing the needs of those with mental illness and promoting overall mental health.
SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration): A federal agency that leads public health efforts to advance the behavioral health of the nation, reducing the impact of substance abuse and mental illness.